Archive for March, 2011

The Heart, Embodied

At this point in my life, what I want is pretty simple. I want to live in my heart, in my body, and in relationships.

For the past 40 years I have been on a spiritual path that has been incredible. I have had the good fortune of having spent time in three different spiritual traditions receiving many blessings, most having to do with helping me open my very hurt heart. While this helped me heal and become more loving, it didn’t lead me to the life I was looking for.

For more than 30 years, I have been a psychologist, and I have studied many theories to do what I could to help my clients heal. I have also done extensive therapy for my own healing. I assumed that working with our emotions and thoughts, dealing with past traumas and current conflicts, could heal whatever struggle we were facing. But, even after all my training, my own therapy and my spiritual practices I still didn’t find the healing I was looking for. Not for me nor for my clients.

For the past 15 years I have taught qigong, an energy meditation practice that focuses on bringing balance to your life by helping you quiet your mind, relax your body and thereby leading to an energetically open-hearted engagement with the world. I felt blessed again and found more healing.

Yet, after all of this, my life was still not transformed the way I thought it should be.

I had a long list of profound spiritual experiences, had healed from many difficult life traumas, and was considered by some to be a master teacher of a mind/body/heart approach to life. Despite all this, I couldn’t live it as well as I could teach it.

Then these last couple of years I have been led to what was missing in my being able to pull all the healing together and live a more present and conscious life. I have been learning how to live an embodied life, meaning I have been learning how to be present in my body in a much deeper way then just being aware of the flow of energy. I have learned to be present to and stay connected with the sensations, feelings, and intuitions that my body is always conveying to me.

I have learned that no matter what healing or guidance you receive – be it spiritual, in therapy, or from an energy practice – or even how much you can find a way to live from your heart center, if you cannot stay grounded in your body, you will not be able to live a coherent life.

To live life authentically and coherently, you need to be in your heart and in your body, and then, consequently, you can have intimate relationships of the kind most of us have always longed for, relationships with continuity and flow. Then happiness, joy, and the peace that passes understanding – knowing the oneness with everything – can be more than a momentary experience. It can be how you experience your life.